Osama Bin-Laden is a white man. Yes, I know he has a ruddy brown complexion and is darker than many black people, but according to none other than the United States Government, he is a white man.
We can even do a color test between Barack Obama and Bin-Laden to see who has darker pigmentation, but that doesn’t matter, it’s Bin-Laden who is classified as being melanin-challenged.
President Obama is a half-Black Man
Osama Bin Laden is a White Guy
How is this possible? How can Bin-Laden be a white man, you ask? He is from Saudi Arabia, which is in the Middle East, and what we consider the Middle East is really, for the most part in Western Asia. This makes him Asian and Arab and brown. Ah, but he is the wrong kind of Asian, and the wrong kind of brown, and since Arabs (like Indians and Pakistanis) are biologically Caucasian, he’s now a white guy.
But wait, our color-blind, let a man be judged by his character rather than the color of his skin government has a different idea. This is pulled directly off the United States Government Census website:
White. A person having origins in any of the original peoples of Europe, the Middle East, or North Africa. It includes people who indicate their race as “White” or report entries such as Irish, German, Italian, Lebanese, Near Easterner, Arab, or Polish.
Right, a Swedish-American has many of the same traits as, let’s say a Libyan.
Wait…that means Colonel Moammar Khadafy is also a white guy! Conan O’Brien, Bin-Laden and Khadafy – all white guys!
Conan O'Brien - Super White Guy
The more we classify and separate each other, the farther we grow apart. The more we mention race and ethnicity it doesn’t heal, it separates. I am refusing to answer the “Race” section on next year’s census. I am an American, I don’t need a hyphen.
This Sunday, October 18, 2009 is the 20th annual Silicon Valley Walk For AIDS.
Whether or not you have any gay friends or relatives, you likely know someone who has contracted the disease, or at the very least, been a fan of a celebrity who suffers from or has died due to the illness.
to former Stanford University basketball star Candice Wiggins’ father, former San Diego Padre, Alan Wiggins, it impacts gay and straight, famous and not so.
Let’s not forget Arthur Ashe, and disco singer, Sylvester, or Olympian Greg Lougainis who is HIV positive.
You can get more information on how to sign up or contribute on their website, www.walkforaids.org
This is just what we need, another political blog from a semi-right-wing living contradiction who is a non-bible-thumping, non-Barack Obama-hating, non-George Bush-loving Republican hailing from San Francisco.
Does the world really need my commentary and opinion? I’d like to think so, because I am right, as in correct, on most things. Am I smarter than you? According to statistics based on that (ha-ha) culturally-biased Stanford-Binet IQ Test, yes – or at least more so than 98% of the general population. But that’s not why I tend to be correct most of the time, it’s because I try to use logic and common sense. Not because I am a pompous jerk that recites test scores, though some may dispute this.
Logic tells me that General Motors cannot survive paying legacy workers’ pensions and benefits to the tune of $6000 per vehicle sold. In other words, $6-large off the top of each car, truck and SUV GM sells goes to pay off people who no longer make their lousy cars in their under-producing factories.
Common sense tells me it’s not racial profiling when police pull over a 1976 Monte Carlo with 20-inch rims and a broken tail light or overly tinted windows in a gang-infested neighborhood.
My heart tells me that if I lived in a poor country with little chance for success that I, too, would beg, borrow and steal my way into this country, regardless of the potential consequences. Same as if my family were hungry, I’d feed them someway, somehow. Not that my methods would be right, but they would be.
My opinion is that all of those who thought George Bush ripped off Al Gore in the “dangling Chad” 2000 election should feel the same way regarding the Al Franken “Minnesota found ballots” in 2009. But they don’t.
And finally, give high school kids condoms. All the damn Trojans they want. Abstinence does not work for most horny teenagers, so give the kid a rubber or deal with the consequences of welfare moms and overcrowded prisons when another ghetto bastard who doesn’t know his dad knocks over a liquor store and gets a 10-year bid on your on your holier-than-thou Theo-Con dime.
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Osama Bin-Laden is a White Man
Tuesday, October 13th, 2009Osama Bin-Laden is a white man. Yes, I know he has a ruddy brown complexion and is darker than many black people, but according to none other than the United States Government, he is a white man.
We can even do a color test between Barack Obama and Bin-Laden to see who has darker pigmentation, but that doesn’t matter, it’s Bin-Laden who is classified as being melanin-challenged.
President Obama is a half-Black Man
Osama Bin Laden is a White Guy
How is this possible? How can Bin-Laden be a white man, you ask? He is from Saudi Arabia, which is in the Middle East, and what we consider the Middle East is really, for the most part in Western Asia. This makes him Asian and Arab and brown. Ah, but he is the wrong kind of Asian, and the wrong kind of brown, and since Arabs (like Indians and Pakistanis) are biologically Caucasian, he’s now a white guy.
But wait, our color-blind, let a man be judged by his character rather than the color of his skin government has a different idea. This is pulled directly off the United States Government Census website:
Right, a Swedish-American has many of the same traits as, let’s say a Libyan.
Wait…that means Colonel Moammar Khadafy is also a white guy! Conan O’Brien, Bin-Laden and Khadafy – all white guys!
Conan O'Brien - Super White Guy
The more we classify and separate each other, the farther we grow apart. The more we mention race and ethnicity it doesn’t heal, it separates. I am refusing to answer the “Race” section on next year’s census. I am an American, I don’t need a hyphen.
Tags: barack obama, conan o'brien, melanin, moammar khadafy, osama bin laden, race, us census, white guys
Posted in Political Satire, Politics, Race and Ethnicity, Things That Irritate Me | 3 Comments »